When an out of work slacker takes a job as an elf in Macy’s Santaland, his hilarious observations of the shoppers and employees are much more naughty than nice. This one-man-act can only be described one way: crazy funny. It’s the 18th year in a row for this show at ACT! Starring Tom Chalmers.

“In this bilingual romantic comedy, circumstances both hilarious and tragic bring together a young Israeli woman, who has little command of English, and a young American man, who has little command of romance. Is their inevitable love an accident … or is it destiny, generations in the making?”

“a hilarious and heartwarming romantic comedy” – The New York Times

Kris Kringle, an old man living in a retirement home, gets a job working as Santa for Macy’s where he surprises employees and customers by claiming to be the real Santa Claus. Seen as deluded by Macy’s vocational counselor, he’s thrown into a court case to determine his mental health and, more importantly, his authenticity. Especially at stake is one little girl’s belief in Santa. The whole family will enjoy this funny, poignant and faithful adaptation of the classic 1947 film.

North Carolina’s oldest professional non-profit ballet company presents the full-length classical holiday tradition with stars, story, and sugarplums. Clara’s magical journey to the Lands of Snow and Sweets featuring the traditional Tchaikovsky score has become a favorite holiday family tradition.

The Holidays have never felt so magical! Get on Asheville’s homegrown purple bus tour and experience a sightseeing history tour injected with enough seasonal cheer to make your belly laugh like a bowl full of jelly. We explore Downtown, the South Slope, Historic Montford, and the River Arts District. This 90 minute holiday extravaganza only happens in December. Get your tickets now!

Please note, that all of these festivities will be held on the grounds of the Hazel Robinson Amphitheatre and are outdoors. Although MPP will provide patio heaters, we ask that you dress very warmly and bring any items or drinks that will help your entire day be filled with warmth.

The Black Mountain Center for the Arts Theatre proudly presents…The Santaland Diaries, written by David Sedaris and adapted for the stage by Joe Mantello.

PLOT SUMMARY: When a down-on-his luck wannabe actor arrives in New York City at the end of the year, the only employment he can find is at Macy’s department store — working in Santaland for the holiday season, as a reluctant, but relentlessly cheerful, elf. Newly christened “Crumpet”, our clever anti-hero shares his observations of the mayhem in front of and behind the scenes during one chaotic December, from aggressive parents and drunken Santas, to flirtatious actors, poor hygiene, and the racially charged hazards of being a “Pointer Elf.” Will Crumpet find a moment of pure Christmas spirit? Will he end up in Santa’s cottage with Snowball the elf? Will he escape with his life on Christmas Eve before being torn apart by enraged customers?

This show contains mature content and is for adults only.

Evening performances on Friday and Saturdays at 7:30 pm and matinees on Sundays at 2:00 pm.

“In this bilingual romantic comedy, circumstances both hilarious and tragic bring together a young Israeli woman, who has little command of English, and a young American man, who has little command of romance. Is their inevitable love an accident … or is it destiny, generations in the making?”

“a hilarious and heartwarming romantic comedy” – The New York Times

An Asheville Holiday staple!

Special Event – Join the Bernsteins for their final year of the raucous holiday fun.

The Bernsteins have thrilled and cracked up Asheville audiences with their antics for a decade. With an all-star cast of local acting talent, the show features Best of WNC Award Winner Tracey Johnston-Crum, well-known Lazoom personality Glenn Reed, Erik Moellering, Sarah Felmet, and Darren Marshall, who has played both Santa Claus and Baby Jesus for all ten years of the Spectacular. Directed by Lucia Del Vecchio, the show is sure to be a rollicking comedy romp, that is most certainly not suitable for all audiences.

December 5 – 21, 2019
Thursdays & Fridays at 7:30 p.m.
Saturdays at 7:30pm & 10 p.m.

Note: Groupons are not accepted for The 10th Annual Bernstein Family Christmas Spectacular.

North Carolina’s oldest professional non-profit ballet company presents the full-length classical holiday tradition with stars, story, and sugarplums. Clara’s magical journey to the Lands of Snow and Sweets featuring the traditional Tchaikovsky score has become a favorite holiday family tradition.

When an out of work slacker takes a job as an elf in Macy’s Santaland, his hilarious observations of the shoppers and employees are much more naughty than nice. This one-man-act can only be described one way: crazy funny. It’s the 18th year in a row for this show at ACT! Starring Tom Chalmers.

Kyle Ayers is a comedian writer, actor, and producer. He is the creator of Boast Rattle, a Compliment Contest, the head-to-head comedic compliment show, which is now the television series Nice One on Quibi (which Kyle also created and is the Executive Producer on). Boast Rattle is also its own show on SiriusXM, running regularly.

He has appeared on Fuse, Comedy Central, VH1, and more, as well as in the film Box Elder, as Phil Ryerson. He’s been heard on Comedy Central Radio, SiriusXM, Bob & Tom, and more.

He has performed multiple times at the prestigious Just for Laughs Comedy Festival, where Time Out New York heralded him as a “breakout star.” He’s headlined all over the world, including Bonnaroo, The New York Comedy Festival, RIOT LA, The World Comedy Summit in Copenhagen, High Plains Comedy in Denver, and more.

His live show Never Seen It, where comedians rewrite famous movies and TV shows they’ve never seen, is now a top iTunes charting podcast on Starburns Audio, featuring Dan Harmon, Henry Zebrowski, and more, and has been featured at festivals around the US and Canada.

He also founded, constructed and runs the heralded underground sketch-acting-theater production-weirdness comedy show, “First Comes Love,” where comedians and actors act out anonymously written adult film scripts from actual aspiring adult film writers, solicited via Craigslist. The show was optioned by MTV for a pilot that Kyle will gladly show you because it should be on TV.

Kyle has written for CBS, Comedy Central, TBS, contributed to Roasts, as well as Huffington Post, CNN, The New York Times, Wired, the weekly sports-comedy show Sports Balls, and more.

He was the tweeter behind the internet sensation #roofbreakup, where he stumbled upon a couple breaking up on his roof in Brooklyn, and the entire world joined in. #roofbreakup was viewed over 10 MILLION times worldwide, appeared on NPR, BBC, Yahoo, Buzzfeed (2+ million views), and was even reenacted by Jerry Springer. The viral sensation haunts Kyle to this day.

If you’re still reading, now we’re into the fun stuff. Kyle created/hosted the viral podcast Faking A Murderer, where he talked with eight comedians for eight hours about the show Making a Murderer, but did not tell his guests that he’d never seen the show. He also wrote and put on the satirical play Glengarry Glenn Beck, which is pretty much what you think it is. He has a dozen more ideas that he wants to sell you, and would be extremely excited to talk to you about.

Featuring Gilbert Lawand

Tickets $10 advance, $12 day of
https://www.eventbrite.com/e/lazoom-comedy-kyle-ayers-tickets-79792881657

When an out of work slacker takes a job as an elf in Macy’s Santaland, his hilarious observations of the shoppers and employees are much more naughty than nice. This one-man-act can only be described one way: crazy funny. It’s the 18th year in a row for this show at ACT! Starring Tom Chalmers.

An Asheville Holiday staple!

Special Event – Join the Bernsteins for their final year of the raucous holiday fun.

The Bernsteins have thrilled and cracked up Asheville audiences with their antics for a decade. With an all-star cast of local acting talent, the show features Best of WNC Award Winner Tracey Johnston-Crum, well-known Lazoom personality Glenn Reed, Erik Moellering, Sarah Felmet, and Darren Marshall, who has played both Santa Claus and Baby Jesus for all ten years of the Spectacular. Directed by Lucia Del Vecchio, the show is sure to be a rollicking comedy romp, that is most certainly not suitable for all audiences.

December 5 – 21, 2019
Thursdays & Fridays at 7:30 p.m.
Saturdays at 7:30pm & 10 p.m.

Note: Groupons are not accepted for The 10th Annual Bernstein Family Christmas Spectacular.

The Black Mountain Center for the Arts Theatre proudly presents…The Santaland Diaries, written by David Sedaris and adapted for the stage by Joe Mantello.

PLOT SUMMARY: When a down-on-his luck wannabe actor arrives in New York City at the end of the year, the only employment he can find is at Macy’s department store — working in Santaland for the holiday season, as a reluctant, but relentlessly cheerful, elf. Newly christened “Crumpet”, our clever anti-hero shares his observations of the mayhem in front of and behind the scenes during one chaotic December, from aggressive parents and drunken Santas, to flirtatious actors, poor hygiene, and the racially charged hazards of being a “Pointer Elf.” Will Crumpet find a moment of pure Christmas spirit? Will he end up in Santa’s cottage with Snowball the elf? Will he escape with his life on Christmas Eve before being torn apart by enraged customers?

This show contains mature content and is for adults only.

“In this bilingual romantic comedy, circumstances both hilarious and tragic bring together a young Israeli woman, who has little command of English, and a young American man, who has little command of romance. Is their inevitable love an accident … or is it destiny, generations in the making?”

“a hilarious and heartwarming romantic comedy” – The New York Times

All proceeds benefit Eliada Homes, a local non-profit supporting the children of WNC.

Experience this contemporary rendition of the beloved Nativity story beautifully told through the gospel according to Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, Paul, George and Ringo. Travel with Mary and Joseph down the “Long and Winding Road” to Bethlehem while savoring dozens of classic Beatles hits. This entertaining Christmas event profoundly reminds us – “All you need is Love”.

Kris Kringle, an old man living in a retirement home, gets a job working as Santa for Macy’s where he surprises employees and customers by claiming to be the real Santa Claus. Seen as deluded by Macy’s vocational counselor, he’s thrown into a court case to determine his mental health and, more importantly, his authenticity. Especially at stake is one little girl’s belief in Santa. The whole family will enjoy this funny, poignant and faithful adaptation of the classic 1947 film.

North Carolina’s oldest professional non-profit ballet company presents the full-length classical holiday tradition with stars, story, and sugarplums. Clara’s magical journey to the Lands of Snow and Sweets featuring the traditional Tchaikovsky score has become a favorite holiday family tradition.

When an out of work slacker takes a job as an elf in Macy’s Santaland, his hilarious observations of the shoppers and employees are much more naughty than nice. This one-man-act can only be described one way: crazy funny. It’s the 18th year in a row for this show at ACT! Starring Tom Chalmers.

The Holidays have never felt so magical! Get on Asheville’s homegrown purple bus tour and experience a sightseeing history tour injected with enough seasonal cheer to make your belly laugh like a bowl full of jelly. We explore Downtown, the South Slope, Historic Montford, and the River Arts District. This 90 minute holiday extravaganza only happens in December. Get your tickets now!